what is the same

I will never be again
who I was with you
hiding
but smiling
gleefully
I pushed
I worked
I laughed
I cried
so much
I cried so much
I cried so much inside

you were never there
and when you were, still gone
writing or typing or listening
to a different song
but I sang
I danced
I smiled
so hard
still I cried
I cried so much inside
I cried so much
your absence
slowly killing me
death near, by my side

so I left
and my world grew dark
barely could I see
only light emitting from others' hearts
and still I wait
awaiting that fateful day
when my own heart
beats again
and leads me astray